March 2012
Mom: LET'S GO I'M READY
: 10 minutes go by
Mom: are you ready yet?????
Me: I've been standing at the door waiting for you for 10 minutes
Mom: Ok I just have to pee and change clothes and water the plants and feed the dogs and cook dinner and swim the english channel
“What if I slept a little more and forgot about all this nonsense.”
– The Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka (via fleur-morte)
extreme makeover: home edition
girl: i kinda like horses
ty: WE MADE YOUR ROOM INTO A HORSE AND DECORATED IT WITH HORSES AND HERE WE GOT YOU 3 PET HORSES AND WE ARE PAYING FOR SURGERY TO MAKE YOU A HORSE
12th graders: ew 11th graders
11th graders: ew 10th graders
10th graders: ew 9th graders
9th graders: ew middle schoolers
middle schoolers: ew elementary kids
elementary kids: ew babies
babies: ew fetus
fetus: ew wait how am i talking
Tumblr: Here, have some kittens...
Tumblr: Delicious food? There.
Tumblr: I bring you some beautiful, insipiring art...
Parents/Roommate/Boss: *walks into the room*
Tumblr: PORN?
Tumblr: YOU SAID PORN?
Tumblr: DID I HEAR DICKS?
Tumblr: WHAT WAS THAT DID YOU MENTION HARDCORE GAY SEX?
